Flattering, or Just Plain Gross...
Saturday, September 03, 2005
so let me set up the scene... I'm waiting at the bus stop, and i have my headphones on blaring ministry's land of rape and honey (ah the classics) and this kid... okay well maybe he's around 17-20, pimply, glasses, wearing a blue shirt, and those basketball jersey shorts, but get this, he's got a hard on... that's right a 5 inch boner coming right at me!.. and he's just standing there in front of me.
so i take off my headphones figured he had asked me something and didn't realize i couldn't hear him...
"does this bus go to eat or westlake?"
"uh... westlake, well it depends on where you're going. it doesn't go to the mall" (where else is he planning on taking his "buddy"?)
so on goes the headphones. he's pacing and stops.
"is this bus always late?"
"yup. usually" (trying my best to talk to his eyes)
i'm thinking is he trying to copy Jackass with the dildo down the pants? did someone put him up to this? should i say something like "sweety, you got something you wanna tell me?" or wait for the bus driver to say "uh you can't board if you've got that" and on go the headphones again... but then... THEN!!! he plops on right next to me...
he stands up walks a bit and stops in front of me AGAIN!
"about how long does is the bus ride"
"not too long" (now i'm getting agitated, dude! there are reasons for the headphones)
just then i notice the bus (yay! never been so happy to see the bus) and all of a sudden he's got a green sweater over his weiner and i hear over the music "sorry i didn't know"
so what the hell?! should i be utterly grossed out or be extremely flattered?! i mean he couldv'e hung things off it! how could he not feel it?! can't you feel that?! JESUS CHRIST!!!
and that's my story for you. ta da!